1. saphura said: …why?
2. jackymedan said: what happened in hawaii?

Let me clarify that nothing tragic or untoward has occurred recently in Hawaii to my knowledge.

But it came to my attention recently how the US annexed Hawaii and ooooh boy I wasn’t ready.

See, I’ve had 12 years of grade school where I learned history, part of it in honors classes, then bunches of years in college that led to a bachelors degree in history. I have almost an entire ceiling high bookshelf full of history, archaeology, and anthropology books. Hell, you can’t graduate from high school where I’m from without taking multiple US history courses.

And at NO POINT did ANYONE tell me how Hawaii became a state.

All we ever got was Hawaii Became a State. Shit, most of the time I didn’t even think to question it. I do recall a couple times thinking “Yeah, but how DID that happen?” I think I may have even asked once and had a teacher basically shrug and move on to Pearl Harbor. Like…what?

So for those of you unaware (Hawaiian folks probably laughing sarcastically in the distance at this point) Hawaii used to have a hereditary monarchy.

BUT THEN

(I tried to find that gif of Powhatan from Pocahantas talking about the pale visitors but I couldn’t find it so just pretend it’s here.)

The US comes in like “Ooooh pretty” and like, you know how racists are worried about Illegal Immigrants ™ coming in and voting and taking over that way? Yeahhhhh, turns out there’s a reason for that. Because the US government legit actually did that. Twice. (The other time was in Texas loooll*cries*Ilivehere*)

Okay, so I’m not an expert on this and most of my info is from various wikipedia pages on Hawai’i’s last monarchs, but from what I gather, the US starts moving in. Americans start relocating to Hawaii, then they used an armed militia to force King Kalakaua AT GUNPOINT to adopt the Bayonet Constitution which stripped the monarchy of its power. Quote from wikipedia:

These anti-monarchists, known as the Hawaiian League, were mainly white men of North American origin, and they quickly appointed themselves as government officials, providing themselves with almost complete control of the government.

Not Pictured Above Because Tumblr Won’t Let Me Honestly Guys I Tried: King Kalakaua, majestic monarch of Hawaii. Among other things, he ended a ban on the hula, which had been outlawed do to American Protestant immigrants being themselves. He brought it back as a celebration of Hawaiian culture.

After his death, he was succeeded by his sister Queen Liliuokalani, who among other things was an awesome composer. Her most famous composition was Aloha O’e, the melody of which I guarantee you’ve heard at least once. She decided, you know what, fuck the Bayonet Constitution. Approximately all of native Hawaiians agreed with her, because seriously, fuck the Bayonet Constitution and fuck the fuckhats who wrote it.

But then the US remembered it has a military and no joke – the United States Marine Corps showed up and overthrew the government. Queen Liliuokalani was the last monarch of Hawaii. A short while later, Hawaii was given a choice, stay a territory or become a state. Being independent wasn’t an option.

So basically, Hawaii is a state because the United States military staged a coup and overthrew the government.

The revolutionaries established the Republic of Hawaii, but their ultimate goal was the annexation of the islands to the United States, which finally occurred in 1898.

Even the President at the time, Grover Cleveland thought this seemed a bit screwy, so he launched an investigation into the legality of the coup, which found “United States diplomatic and military representatives had abused their authority and were responsible for the change in government.” Grover Cleveland later stated  "Substantial wrong has thus been done which a due regard for our national character as well as the rights of the injured people requires we should endeavor to repair the monarchy.“

To which the Senate, full of Pro-Overthrow the Government of Hawaii-ahem, I mean, Pro-Annexation representatives basically responded by giving Grover Cleveland and the entire native population of Hawaii the finger.

And of course, none of this is ever mentioned in any US history class I have ever taken. Wouldn’t want to make the American government look bad, now would we? Wouldn’t want those fertile young minds thinking it’s cool to question authority figures. It also puts the whole Lets Nuke the Fuck Out of Japan For Bombing Pearl Harbor thing into perspective. We, as a nation, got fucking pissed enough to unleash nuclear warfare onto the world over land that never properly belonged to us in the first place.

Hawaii, you got screwed and I am so so sorry. And I’m sorry that I, person with a bachelors in history, never knew.

Also I’m sorry if I got stuff wrong. I’ve just unearthed this mine of suck recently.